tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post8126225884887461352..comments2023-06-14T15:23:38.668+01:00Comments on The Rambling Curl: 50 Shades For Dummiesmrsmanicshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09894116750061022896noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-60380541750869397342018-02-12T08:32:08.958+00:002018-02-12T08:32:08.958+00:00Hi. Firstly, thanks so much for the permission to ...Hi. Firstly, thanks so much for the permission to speak out. Golly, without that, I would have had to delete this post, because how dare I express an opinion you dislike without you telling me i’m allowed to?!<br /><br />Next, your rather stupid claim that i’m just projecting my feelings about my own abuse experience onto these books/films. You’re wrong. My experiences merely opened my eyes to what abuse actually is and that means I recognise it, now. Thousands of abuse survivors recognise it in these books. Many abuse charities recognise it in these books/films. Many journalists are starting to review the latest film with an eye to the fact that Christian Grey is abusive. Are they ALL “Ignorant and stupid” and “projecting” their feelings onto it, or maybe could YOU be the one missing something, here? Because you’re the one who believes coercion, threats of non-consensual violence, stalking, manipulation and possessive, controlling behaviour is somehow NOT abuse, despite the fact that the law now recognised all of the above as being part of psychological/emotional abuse and therefore a crime (stalking is a crime all on its own, too). I dob’t need to project anything. I can just read a book that glorifies such gross behaviour and recognise it in black and white. Just like many thousands of others have.<br /><br />You make the judgement that I am moaning about a book/film franchise rather than “helping a women’s shelter.” I actually run an abuse-awareness campaign and spend much of my free time educating people as to what abuse is, in order to prevent anyone else going through what I did. You might want to refrain from making unfounded judgements about a stranger’s personality. It makes you look “ignorant and stupid.” <br /><br />As for only criticising the third film, keep up sweetie. I’ve spoken loudly against all of the books and all the films. Do your homework. Also look at the date this article was published. How could it be about the third film, unless i’ve somehow discovered time travel?!<br /><br />Lastly, I have deleted your other, more aggressive comment. I don’t tolerate abusive language on here and if you post more of it, you will be blocked. What I will say is I was not married to my abuser, so your frequent references to my “ex husband” were incorrect. <br /><br />You will need to learn, as you go through life, that some people hold views on things that differ to your own. You will need to understand that the media we consume - books, music and films - all have the power to influence society’s views and beliefs. That’s why when a book or a film romanticises something terrible, it is always worth speaking out against it. You don’t have to agree with me, or anyone else who has an opinion that goes against your own. But you should listen. And you should never refer to people as being “ignorant and stupid” JUST for saying something you disagree with, when they are speaking from a place of education and training on this subject, as well as lived experience.<br /><br />I hope you never meet anyone like Christian Grey.mrsmanicshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09894116750061022896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-62360562510003319842018-02-12T03:15:55.880+00:002018-02-12T03:15:55.880+00:00You know what she can speak out but this book has ... You know what she can speak out but this book has in movie has nothing to do with her so she's basically projecting her feelings onto movie and book rather than actually projecting it into something else positive like helping out a woman shelter or something like that to sit there because your life is so miserable and projects your feelings from a movie that has nothing to do with you and is only there for entertainment value is ridiculous and if anybody is against this whole thing the person is called ignorant and stupid I'm sorry there is nothing about this movie that needs this much attention and study it really isn't it's a movie and I'm sorry if you didn't complain about the first two movies why are you complaining about the last Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04109406797344724914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-43737302072019260442014-09-13T20:59:04.192+01:002014-09-13T20:59:04.192+01:00You nailed it. As I read this book I just wished t...You nailed it. As I read this book I just wished to go out sometimes and start killing abusive men. Like just take a sharp object, knife or a sword and simply cut off their heads. I was-I think- mostly angered by book 3. She got pregnant because she forgot her shots, which is legit because she had lots of work, father in hospital ect. This is kind of stuff that might get you tangled up and miss doctor's appointments because day only has 24 hours and you have to eat and sleep as well. But Christian freaks out. He literally has such strong reaction to it, he calls her stupid and even accuses her of doing it out of spite. Yeah his wife got pregnant just to make him angry. -_-. He then storms out and leaves for whole fucking night, returning very late and so wasted that he can barely stand. It turns out later that he was with another woman(the one who abused him and one whom Anastasia hates). And HE gets mad at ANA for going to another room and NOT WANTING to share bed with him. Let me repeat. After he stormed out, didn't return her calls, got drunk, supposedly cheated on her and came back home late. And everyone around her tells her not to give up on him. And she and others keep repeating he's gonna be a good father. I just...I wanted the author to burn in hell for that thing alone. I'm sorry but no. Christian Gray is NOT a "good father" material. Nina Valehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08812919881547985261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-63256475096262524622013-08-12T11:45:32.729+01:002013-08-12T11:45:32.729+01:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16124506719466981958noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-73608017873893427272013-02-15T02:54:39.840+00:002013-02-15T02:54:39.840+00:00Wonderful post--you nailed the things that are so ...Wonderful post--you nailed the things that are so very wrong with the 50Shades books. Best of luck with your own novel. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-86987314232762090562013-02-09T00:35:50.089+00:002013-02-09T00:35:50.089+00:00Well written, thank you for this. People keep sayi...Well written, thank you for this. People keep saying that all of us anti-50Shades activists need to shut up because we sound like broken records. But the more people express these same opinions about these books and educate people on abuse and why these books shouldn't be romanticized, the better. If even just one person changes their stance and realizes that they've been duped with these books, then it's a start.<br />I'm so sorry for your experience with an abusive relationship, I've had a toxic one in the past myself and I don't wish it on anyone. I'll be following your blog and look forward to your book. Bravo for taking a stand.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05101264920457317836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-22422871325024112982013-02-07T15:01:37.211+00:002013-02-07T15:01:37.211+00:00I liked this post a lot. I wanted to chime in, to...I liked this post a lot. I wanted to chime in, toward that end there, that I recently read a YA book, Deb Caletti's Stay, featuring a love interest--also named Christian--that deals with exactly this turn from intense/obsessive to dangerous, and leaving it. It's teens/high schoolers, but I thought it a really, really refreshing contrast to what's going on in adult romance at the moment.A.https://www.blogger.com/profile/00162487656669646530noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-23937526533675202332013-02-02T18:38:15.644+00:002013-02-02T18:38:15.644+00:00Thank you! :-) I'll check that page out; I...Thank you! :-) I'll check that page out; I'm all for anything that calls this book out for what it is. mrsmanicshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09894116750061022896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-70563644267190531752013-01-17T09:14:48.352+00:002013-01-17T09:14:48.352+00:00I support you 100%. You are brave to speak out, yo...I support you 100%. You are brave to speak out, you are right, and you are beautiful to me.<br /><br />I have never been in an abusive relationship. I am lucky enough to have known women who were and who spoke out like you have and who kept my head screwed on straight. That makes you a hero in my book.<br /><br />I will stand with you against Fifty Shades of Abuse.<br /><br />By the way, I've come to your blog via a very therapeutic Facebook page called 50 Shades of Craptastic Grey. It isn't mine, but I support it heartily. If you need catharsis, that's another good place to get it.<br /><br />http://www.facebook.com/50ShadesOfCraptasticGrey/posts/356067864501471verminjerkyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03682159497490249973noreply@blogger.com