tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post4583346057022620629..comments2023-06-14T15:23:38.668+01:00Comments on The Rambling Curl: Guest post: Fifty Shades of Growing A Spinemrsmanicshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09894116750061022896noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-59344146966305182272015-02-18T14:26:00.599+00:002015-02-18T14:26:00.599+00:00She also couldn't stop smiling when I showed h...She also couldn't stop smiling when I showed her the comments.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-75014421694175280952015-02-18T14:23:26.692+00:002015-02-18T14:23:26.692+00:00Thanks Mason! I passed on your comments to Julia (...Thanks Mason! I passed on your comments to Julia (who doesn't have her own blog and chooses to remain anonymous) and she was really, really pleased. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-62047955116327902832015-02-18T11:29:16.132+00:002015-02-18T11:29:16.132+00:00Hi, I'm so sorry for the situation your friend...Hi, I'm so sorry for the situation your friend is in; it sounds awful and obviously it's impacting on you, too. Unfortunately, it's really hard to address the issue of abuse with someone who is going through it but is unable to see it. My own best friend found it hard to get *me* to realise that I needed to get out of my abusive relationship.<br /><br />Always try starting from a position where the focus is on your friend and her feelings. Try to explain that you realise that she loves her boyfriend, but that you're very worried and just want to talk with her and help her to understand that you're here for her and will support her. Explain that whatever she has been told, there is no excuse that makes abuse okay and it is NOT her fault in any way that this is happening to her. Explain that you can help her find professional support if that's what she needs. But be aware that sometimes, people find it very hard to accept that what they're experiencing is abuse. That said, try not to personally give advice, as the person really needs to decide what is best for them without feeling too pressured. <br /><br />Obviously, I can only talk from experience, rather than from a professional background. This link has a few tips you might find useful. http://www.bandbacktogether.com/how-to-help-friend-abusive-relationship/<br /><br />I'd also recommend reading Women's Aid's page, as they are brilliant when it comes to advice etc. You could even email them and ask for some advice.<br /><br />I hope that your friend manages to get out of this relationship and move forwards with her life. Best of luck to her and you. xmrsmanicshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09894116750061022896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-83828693442575689522015-02-18T11:15:00.349+00:002015-02-18T11:15:00.349+00:00I would totally watch that!I would totally watch that!mrsmanicshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09894116750061022896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-50893671130087739212015-02-18T06:51:12.116+00:002015-02-18T06:51:12.116+00:00This one's great, and so is yours! So I know f...This one's great, and so is yours! So I know for the posts I've been reading that you were in an abusive relationships. I have a friend of mine that's been going through what I believe to be a very unhealthy and abusive relationships. She's been in the relationship (on and off) for about five years now, and when it started it we were both very young, so neither of us noticed any problems, but as we grew older, the relationship got worse, to the point where she had to lie to him when she was with me (he doesn't want me to be her friend) and even take her computer to my house and pretend she was at hers, so we could hang out. He banned her from having a Facebook account (even though he still has his) and when she broke up with him and tried to start a new relatioship he threatened to hit the other guy. I've tried several times to make her realize it's not healthy, but she gets angry at me whenever I try to talk about it. She's not currently speaking to me because I showed her an article talking about abusive relationships. I was wondering if you could help me find better ways to address this problem with her, I really really care about my friend, we grew up together and I don't want to see her wasting her life in this horrible man. Thanks x. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07057461565473107005noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3966316529291694099.post-2729862683396134872015-02-17T03:27:49.295+00:002015-02-17T03:27:49.295+00:00Is it wrong I want to see a fan-film of this scena...Is it wrong I want to see a fan-film of this scenario? That was awesome!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12291629402245421374noreply@blogger.com